Prelude :: This could be even suffixed with "most" of the mundane matters that I have been talking about......!!
Dear All
How much people (particularly the oldies) need to speak out ?...and how much joy / relief it gives them.....?
It is too glaring to watch their emotions and more than that, it gives us (the listener) of having done some thing worthwhile without even tainting our finger nails :-)
I always have a flair of listening when some one speaks their heart out; The only qualification that attracts me to become all ears is when I find the speaker too intense and involved as they begin to talk.......!!
It is always a joy to watch the series of emotions - first, the real hunger to tell all their words with a sense of urgency (perhaps before we lose our interest or focus.....), the relevant emotions dangling in their face on the points which deserve an escalation marks in their narration, a sense of pride when we acknowledge or nod the heads appropriately at the right times (a superlative elation when we ask them some sensible or relevant questions or anticipated remarks - during the course of their talk) and above all, the peace in their faces after they are "relieved" from their verbal rain.
In fact I distinctly remember one of my maternal uncle (who had a constant urge for giving lectures) gave me a whole hearted certificate in the middle of one of his long talks (of course monologue only :-)) that I was a great listener and I will learn too much with this single trait. This happened long back - during my adolescent age.
Yesterday my father was sharing some old incident of his life where he had goose bumps at a particular co incidence.
To put the long and emotional (I mean for him) story short - it seems he was lamenting about a strained relationship to some body (just a train acquaintance - not some one too close) which happened due to borrowing of a book from his child hood friend. It so happened that when his "so called" close friend reminded about the book which was not returned back for such a long time with a tinge of sarcasm, some thing within my father broke down and he returned back the book on the very next day abruptly without speaking a single word and snapped off the relationship with him. He indeed never got in touch with him again over this small incident. The fact was that he was reading that borrowed book with lot of interest and spending time on it almost daily and never had an idea to retain the book for ever.......
The Train friend smilingly listened and in a casual tone persisted my father to come to his house for a cup of coffee. They both -seems - get down at same railway station and my father reached his home without much of doubt or curiosity. After a brief introduction to the family members, when my father rose up to leave, his friend stopped him and gave him a book which was exactly the same one which caused that strained relationship. It appears that it is a rare book and my father's heart almost stopped for seconds at the pleasant surprise...;
Needless to say, his train friend just wanted to give a pleasant surprise to this man who was still reeling about the pain that was still lingering after more than a decade of this incident.
Past is past.....!! Right.....??
But then, you should see the eyes of the man who is nearing eighty years now who was at the best of his expression while he narrated the incident which happened thirty years back.......!!
Now, the point is not about enriching our lives by learning others' lives (which any way is a consequence when we lend ears) - it is about the magic of touching human lives and giving others extra ordinary moments of relieving themselves or re-living their past great moments without doing much from our side...
Approximately an year back I had written (it was Mundane matter - 4 if I remember right !!) on being bit empathetic to people around us which does not sweat us too much....
In fact with this post, I am diluting it bit further making it much more easier / mundane for you guys.....
Yes, Bit of time spent on listening others intently can matter most for those hapless souls.
Of course, this is a very objective statement and you need to be really street smart and sharp enough on the details hovering this topic (viz., to whom, for how long, at what cost.....and so on;). Beware there could be occasions where we need to aggressively put out discussions some times to avoid our regrets & self pities later....
Such are the ways of AGANDAM.......!!
You never cant write any thing in black and white and can only express things with some element of subjectivity and conditions....hmm.....!! Chalo.
Love // Suren
Dear All
How much people (particularly the oldies) need to speak out ?...and how much joy / relief it gives them.....?
It is too glaring to watch their emotions and more than that, it gives us (the listener) of having done some thing worthwhile without even tainting our finger nails :-)
I always have a flair of listening when some one speaks their heart out; The only qualification that attracts me to become all ears is when I find the speaker too intense and involved as they begin to talk.......!!
It is always a joy to watch the series of emotions - first, the real hunger to tell all their words with a sense of urgency (perhaps before we lose our interest or focus.....), the relevant emotions dangling in their face on the points which deserve an escalation marks in their narration, a sense of pride when we acknowledge or nod the heads appropriately at the right times (a superlative elation when we ask them some sensible or relevant questions or anticipated remarks - during the course of their talk) and above all, the peace in their faces after they are "relieved" from their verbal rain.
In fact I distinctly remember one of my maternal uncle (who had a constant urge for giving lectures) gave me a whole hearted certificate in the middle of one of his long talks (of course monologue only :-)) that I was a great listener and I will learn too much with this single trait. This happened long back - during my adolescent age.
Yesterday my father was sharing some old incident of his life where he had goose bumps at a particular co incidence.
To put the long and emotional (I mean for him) story short - it seems he was lamenting about a strained relationship to some body (just a train acquaintance - not some one too close) which happened due to borrowing of a book from his child hood friend. It so happened that when his "so called" close friend reminded about the book which was not returned back for such a long time with a tinge of sarcasm, some thing within my father broke down and he returned back the book on the very next day abruptly without speaking a single word and snapped off the relationship with him. He indeed never got in touch with him again over this small incident. The fact was that he was reading that borrowed book with lot of interest and spending time on it almost daily and never had an idea to retain the book for ever.......
The Train friend smilingly listened and in a casual tone persisted my father to come to his house for a cup of coffee. They both -seems - get down at same railway station and my father reached his home without much of doubt or curiosity. After a brief introduction to the family members, when my father rose up to leave, his friend stopped him and gave him a book which was exactly the same one which caused that strained relationship. It appears that it is a rare book and my father's heart almost stopped for seconds at the pleasant surprise...;
Needless to say, his train friend just wanted to give a pleasant surprise to this man who was still reeling about the pain that was still lingering after more than a decade of this incident.
Past is past.....!! Right.....??
But then, you should see the eyes of the man who is nearing eighty years now who was at the best of his expression while he narrated the incident which happened thirty years back.......!!
Now, the point is not about enriching our lives by learning others' lives (which any way is a consequence when we lend ears) - it is about the magic of touching human lives and giving others extra ordinary moments of relieving themselves or re-living their past great moments without doing much from our side...
Approximately an year back I had written (it was Mundane matter - 4 if I remember right !!) on being bit empathetic to people around us which does not sweat us too much....
In fact with this post, I am diluting it bit further making it much more easier / mundane for you guys.....
Yes, Bit of time spent on listening others intently can matter most for those hapless souls.
Of course, this is a very objective statement and you need to be really street smart and sharp enough on the details hovering this topic (viz., to whom, for how long, at what cost.....and so on;). Beware there could be occasions where we need to aggressively put out discussions some times to avoid our regrets & self pities later....
Such are the ways of AGANDAM.......!!
You never cant write any thing in black and white and can only express things with some element of subjectivity and conditions....hmm.....!! Chalo.
Love // Suren
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